Begin Again Read online

  “Greg. Office. Now.”

  I heard him mutter a few curses and ask what my problem was. The chief wasn’t in his office, which he never usually was—always one to be active and almost never at a desk—so we went in there.

  “Close the door,” I told him. He was scowling and looked like he wanted to tell me off, but he turned around and closed it.

  I laid my palms on the desk. “Isn’t it your turn to wash the trucks and clean the area?”

  He shrugged. “Yeah. So what? I still have until noon.”

  Unbelievable. “You’re going to clean inside, as well as outside, both apparatuses and the room in under four hours? All of this should have been done yesterday before the new crew came in.”

  “Alright, man. Chill. What’s your problem?”

  I came around the desk and stood in front of him. “My problem is that this job you’ve chosen is not for messing around in. You’ve signed up to save lives, and a significant part of that is keeping the equipment up to code. Do you understand my problem now?”

  Greg’s nose flared as if he had to rein in his temper. “Got it.”

  “Now get out there and do your job. Playtime is over.”

  Greg swung the door open and stalked out of the office just as Chief Hickman came in. He frowned when he saw Greg and shot me a curious look. “What’s all that about?”

  “I lost it when I saw the trucks weren’t done and neither was the room.”

  I heard his chair squeak and looked at him leaning back. His arms were crossed at his chest. “Saw that. Greg’s a flighty guy who doesn’t take much stock in the seriousness of any given situation, let alone his job as a fireman. And I rely on you to help me out with that. Nice to see you are.”

  I rested against the wall and ran my hands through my hair.

  “What’s eatin’ ya, son?”

  “Nothing. I was out of line. It won’t happen again.” I headed for the door.

  “Easton.”

  My hand touching the doorknob, I looked over my shoulder. “Yeah?”

  “Josh’s anniversary is coming up, as you know.” At the mention of Josh’s name, I tensed. “And I think it would be best for you to take some time off.”

  I turned and faced him. “Chief, that’s not necessary.”

  He shot me a look. “I wasn’t asking.”

  “I need to work.”

  “Luke, your father passed just a few weeks ago. Now, I know you’ve got the ranch to tend to, and it’s calving season, if I’m not mistaken.”

  “I need to be here. The men are counting on me.”

  “You saying I can’t run this place?”

  “No, I didn’t mean that. Sorry, sir.”

  “Listen,” he said as he laid his arms on his desk and leaned against it, “perhaps the best thing for you right now is to just have some time for yourself.”

  “Sir, I need to be here. You don’t know—”

  He held up a hand. “I know exactly what happened. You got sloshed one night and Josh had to come in and do your job for you. And because he had to come in and do that job, in your place, it was him that died and not you.” I bowed my head, not wanting to look at him. “Let me tell you somethin’. This job, like most other jobs, has its risks. You all know that when you sign up. You were stupid one night, and someone else had to pay the consequences. It sucks, but it happened. And I will not have you overworking yourself on this job because you feel you have something to prove. You hear me, boy?”

  One of the many things I respected about Hickman was that he was hard-hitting, but with a velvet hammer. He cared about his team. “Chief.” I searched for the right words. “Being here, and keeping busy, it keeps me levelheaded. And I do owe it to Josh to serve in his place and be what he can’t. This is my lifeline.”

  “Get a new lifeline.”

  “Sir?”

  “Luke, I won’t tell you again. Go home. You want to work? Work on your ranch. Have fun for a week. Meet a girl. We’re done here.”

  “You’re telling me I’m not to come back for a full week?”

  He started scribbling on some papers. “Yes. This is a small town. You and I both know there’s not a lot that goes on, so we’ll be fine. I’ve got plenty of capable men.”

  I stared at him like he’d lost his old mind.

  He looked up from his paperwork and raised his brows. “That starts now.”

  Without another word, I left his office and went into the break room. Greg was making himself a sandwich, and with the mood I was in, I could have knocked him to the ground for not doing as I asked. But I wasn’t that guy, though sometimes my anger chose to get the better of me.

  “Goin’ somewhere?” he asked with a mouthful as I opened my locker for some of my things.

  “None of your business.” I shut the door, walked out, and got in my truck, slamming a hand against the steering wheel.

  What the hell was I supposed to do for a full week? The chief’s words came to mind, along with Josh’s in his letter. That led me to Maggie. I peered in the rearview mirror at her apartment. Her curtains were open, and I could see a small group of little girls twirling around in pink tutus. I wanted Maggie, but I wasn’t sure how this was going to work. Her fiancé was dead because of me. How could I expect her to be okay with that when I wasn’t?

  My cell rang, snapping me from my thoughts. “Yeah?”

  “Luke, oh, I’m so glad I caught you.”

  “Hey, mom.”

  “Hey, honey. Your uncle is throwing a family reunion together on Wednesday. I told him you would likely be at the fire station, but wanted to check with you.”

  “Wednesday? An odd day to have a gathering.”

  “Yes, but I guess they are getting ready to renovate their home, and so it would be a while before they’d be able to have anyone over.”

  “I don’t know, Ma. I’ve got—” Screw it. “Never mind. I’m actually free that day.”

  I pulled the phone away from my ear until her screams stopped. I laughed. My mom was always the excitable one of the bunch.

  “Well, this is just perfect. When was the last time you and I’ve gotten to do something together with family?”

  “A long time, Ma.”

  “So will anyone be joining you? Neale, maybe? I know he loves to eat and is a big fan of Lenny’s wings.”

  I looked in my review mirror again. Maggie was doing some sort of routine, from what I could tell. Even from there I could tell she was smiling, enjoying herself. “I have someone in mind.”

  Chapter 11

  Maggie

  The girls surprised me. With only a few minor corrections, they were ready for their big day at the festival. I helped them gather their things and saw them off out into the hallway when Luke caught my eye. He was coming out of his apartment.

  “Bye, Ms. Warner,” the girls said in unison as their parents toted them off.

  I waved at them and waited by the door when Luke started to come my way. He looked like he’d had a rough morning and I wondered why he was there and not across the street.

  “You weren’t sent to detention for being late, were you?” he asked.

  I laughed. “I wasn’t late, remember? Besides, only one of my students was here waiting when I got in, so I’m safe.”

  “Good.”

  There was a tightness around the corners of his eyes. “Is everything alright?” I gestured to the two duffel bags at his feet. Was he going away?

  “Yeah, I’m just…I’ll be at the ranch all week. The chief said he was giving me time off.”

  “The ranch? Did something happen?” I stepped closer to him and crossed my arms, waiting for his reply. His stare lingered on my face.

  “No,” he whispered. “All’s well.” There was something in the way he said it that told me everything wasn’t fine. But I didn’t know how to help a man like Luke. He didn’t seem the type to need help from anyone, or ask for it. It made me feel small. “Going to Marybeth’s today?”

  “Yea
h, you?”

  “Nah, I plan on doing some things around the house. Probably be moving there completely within a few days or so.”

  “Oh.” I mentally kicked myself for sounding so disappointed. “Well, it makes sense now that the ranch is yours. You don’t need an apartment.”

  “No, guess not.” He paused. “Maggie, wou—” He shook his head. “I’ll see you in a couple of days?” he asked as he picked up his bags. He wanted to ask me something else, but then changed his mind. I couldn’t describe the disappointment I felt. It was new.

  “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

  “Alright.” He winked and walked off. “See ya around.”

  I leaned against the doorframe and watched him leave. I didn’t want to like him and still found it hard to accept. But I’d been sad for so long, and Luke was the only thing that seemed to make me forget, even if only for a few seconds.

  ***

  “…so then I said, you aren’t hurting me none,” Larry said, finishing a story about him and some woman who’d recently left him. I filled all four men’s coffee mugs and waited for the laughter to die down before asking if they needed anything else. “What’s new with you, Magnolia? What would you say to dating an old man like me?”

  Larry was only half joking. Putting on my best smile, I pretended to consider his proposal. “I’m afraid I couldn’t handle you.”

  He laughed and the other guys joined in. “What can I say? I’ve always been too much for the ladies.”

  Excusing myself, I went to the back. But someone touched my shoulder.

  “Magnolia?” I turned around and saw the chief. I hadn’t seen him since the day of Josh’s funeral.

  “Chief Hickman,” I said as we gave each other a hug.

  “You know to call me Russ. How are you? I’m sorry I wasn’t there the other day when you stopped by for Josh’s things. But Luke said he helped you with that?”

  “Yeah, he did. I appreciated it.”

  “Good. Glad to hear. What’s new with you? Still dancing?”

  I always felt ashamed when I had to answer that question. “No, but I do teach dance.”

  “No? Why not? You were so good.”

  “I guess too many things have changed for me to keep my joy.”

  “Aw. Well, at least you haven’t given up completely.”

  He was trying to compliment me, but I knew he still didn’t understand. “Need a table?”

  “Yes, actually. I had to skip breakfast.”

  I walked him over to an open booth. “You skipped breakfast? That’s not good.”

  “You’re tellin’ me. Imagine having to do what I do when you’re feelin’ faint. Not a good combination.”

  It wasn’t my place, but I was concerned about Luke. I knew the chief never just sent men home if there wasn’t a good reason. “So I saw Luke just a little while ago.”

  “Oh, that’s right. You both live in the same building?”

  “Yeah. Coffee?”

  “You betcha,” he said, lifting his cup.

  “Anyway, that was really sweet of you to give him time off for the ranch.”

  I searched his face and saw the briefest of frowns. “Well, you know I try to take care of my crew.”

  He took a sip of his coffee, and I knew the conversation was over. Others loved to gossip, but Hickman wasn’t in that circle. “Okay, I—”

  “Where are you going to be working now that Marybeth’s is closing? Still going to work here?”

  “No, I think the new owners want everything new, including the people.”

  “That’s a shame.”

  “Yeah, but I found another job, so it’s okay.”

  “Oh yeah? Where?”

  Whether I should say or not was difficult to decide, but maybe he’d open up some more about Luke. “On the ranch…with Luke.”

  His eyes widened. “You don’t say?”

  “Yeah, it’s nice because he needed help, and I needed another job. I didn’t know at first that was his ranch.”

  “Yeah, the boy’s father passed about a few weeks ago now. Stubborn, if you ask me. Doesn’t really like to seek help from anyone, but…”

  “Well, I really appreciate him allowing me to work there.”

  “I’m sure he loves having you there.” As if he knew he’d said something he shouldn’t have, he quickly picked up his coffee and took another sip.

  “What can I get you to eat?”

  Hickman smiled, appreciating my change of subject. “Give me the farmer’s breakfast.”

  “You got it,” I said, tapping my pencil on the notepad.

  “Magnolia—Maggie?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Maybe check in on him?”

  I couldn’t believe he asked me to check on Luke. Maybe Luke wasn’t dealing with his father’s death like he wanted everyone to believe.

  “Sure. I’ll do that.”

  ***

  He wasn’t expecting me. I had no reason to be there today, but there I was, changed into my working clothes and riding down his lane.

  As I drew closer to the house, I could hear the loud cries of cattle. He must have been rounding them up.

  I hopped off my bike and went in search of the noise. He was in the back and riding Cowboy. They were running back and forth, and for a moment I was confused about what Luke was doing. Then it clicked. He was herding the cows to another location. They eventually bunched together loosely and he turned in some zigzag motion to keep them all moving in a straight line.

  I was impressed at his abilities, though he was born and raised on a ranch, so it should have come as second nature.

  My gaze zoned in on him sitting on his horse, shirtless as always. At every movement Cowboy made, Luke’s body molded with him, and the muscles in his back pushed and pulled against each other. I’d always been attracted to a hardworking man, and Luke was no exception.

  I heard him call out to the herd and saw him grab something in front of him to wipe at his forehead. Thinking he might be thirsty, I went inside and got a bottled water from the fridge to take to him. I was just in time. He closed the gate as I reached him.

  He caught a glimpse of me, and I smiled. “Maggie?”

  “Thought you could use a drink.” I handed it to him, and he took a generous sip. He wiped at his brows with the back of his forearm.

  “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” He stared at me, as if waiting for an explanation why I was there. “I thought maybe you could use some help. At no charge.”

  “Well, that’s not happening. You aren’t working for free.” He walked past me and Cowboy stayed by the gate. I caught up to him.

  “No, really. I’m not accepting a dime from you today.” He stopped and I almost crashed into his back.

  He faced me and smirked. “Are you arguing with me, Boots? I think that’s a first. I’ve never seen you argue.”

  I scoffed. “I’ve argued.”

  “When?” He crossed his arms, still wearing that handsome smile.

  I stumbled over my words. “When I feel it’s necessary.”

  “Oh yeah?”

  “Yeah. Anyway, I saw Chief Hickman at the diner.”

  His smile faltered. I’d said too much. “Hickman, you say?”

  “Yeah, he just needed lunch.”

  He shook his head, but smiled. “I bet he did. Well…are you ready to get dirty?”

  I furrowed my brows and he gestured for me to follow him. Knowing he couldn’t see me, I stuck my tongue out at him and laughed.

  “Are you laughing at me?” he asked as we came to the gate he’d first taken me to—the one by the cows about to give birth.

  “Nope.”

  “Sure.” He placed his hands on the gate. “I just saw that one of my first-calving heifers is ready to calve. I think she started labor early this morning, from what I can tell, so she’s in need of some assistance. Think you can handle it?”

  A raindrop splashed on the tip of my nose and was followed by a s
teady downpour. I raised my hand over my brows to see Luke.

  “Here,” he said as he took his hat off and placed it on me. I stared up at him, feeling ridiculous for being vulnerable. “That’s better,” he whispered.

  Our eyes remained locked, and I wondered if he was going to kiss me. I wanted him to. He leaned in and I parted my lips, when a cow started to moo. Luke closed his eyes as if needing to rein in his emotions.

  “The lady calls.” He opened the gate and I went through. The heifer he spoke of was lying on the ground in a far corner away from the others. She looked in distress. “She’s definitely ready.”

  “How can you tell?”

  “She’s no longer pacing. Quick, let’s get to her.” We ran over to where she was, my feet sticking to the mud. The rain was coming down hard.

  “Luke, what can I do?” I yelled so he could hear me through the heavy rain.

  “She’s not going anywhere. So we’ll have it here instead of putting her in the headgate.”

  “Okay.”

  Luke looked left to right. “Maggie, I have some gloves that I laid by the trough. You should be able to reach and grab them.”

  “On it!” I rushed to the trough, bent down in the mud, and reached for the gloves. I went back to Luke. “Here.”

  “Thanks.” He pulled them on, and they stretched all the way to his elbows. “I’m going to try and pull it out, so maybe stand up by her head. If she kicks, I don’t want her kicking you.”

  I did as he asked and prayed the cow wouldn’t kick him either. I knelt and rubbed at its neck, not sure if this was something you were supposed to do, but I needed to feel like I was doing something.

  Luke reached inside the cow and felt around. “Well, it’s not breech, thank God.”

  Craning my neck, I tried to see what was happening. A yellowish sac was hanging out of her.

  “Maggie, in the barn, there’s some rope. Bring it to me.”

  I took off as if the cow’s life depended on it. I might have been born and raised a country girl, but any kind of farm work wasn’t where I thrived. I was a dancer. But something about this was exciting. Out of breath, I looked around the barn and eventually saw the rope resting on a hook. I grabbed it and ran back.